Poem: My Old Friend
A "friend with benefits" comes back from the past and stirs up old feelings in the narrator of this poem.
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Poem: He Sold Me on Change
October is domestic violence awareness month; however we know that domestic violence happens year round. This poem talks about a survivor's experience going back to her abuser.
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October is domestic violence awareness month; however we know that domestic violence happens year round. This poem talks about a survivor's experience going back to her abuser.
Read More
Dark Brown Eyes
Behind these eyes
there are feelings
of guilt and shame
for giving a small
fragment of self
to undeserving individuals
for sharing love
for caring.
Behind these eyes
there are feelings
of sadness
and loneliness
because a desperate
soul put a fragile
heart at risk
tears have forgot
about falling.
These eyes long
to be touched
by a miracle again.
They yearn for happiness
They desire companionship
They deserve attention.
False fronts
to hold back emotions
protection for the inner self.
These dark brown eyes
need a reflection of a
special someone's face
who can give them vision.
Nicholl McGuire
there are feelings
of guilt and shame
for giving a small
fragment of self
to undeserving individuals
for sharing love
for caring.
Behind these eyes
there are feelings
of sadness
and loneliness
because a desperate
soul put a fragile
heart at risk
tears have forgot
about falling.
These eyes long
to be touched
by a miracle again.
They yearn for happiness
They desire companionship
They deserve attention.
False fronts
to hold back emotions
protection for the inner self.
These dark brown eyes
need a reflection of a
special someone's face
who can give them vision.
Nicholl McGuire
It Was All Lies
His smile was a lie like that of a clown.
Behind the face was evil.
The first date
Corners of eyes were looking at someone else.
Next date
Phone rang unanswered.
Third date
Late again, always an excuse.
Fourth date
Lost in eyes and words.
Fifth date
Life stories.
Sixth date
Lustful thoughts.
Seventh date
His eyes were like snakes still looking at others.
Why did I allow this?
I reasoned it was natural.
I shook away what I thought was insecurity.
Told him I didn't believe in men having women friends.
He thought I didn't know any better.
I should have said I didn't believe he could be a friend to women.
He held my hand.
Lips desperate for a kiss.
Another lie dripped from his tongue.
I wasn't his only one,
he guided us to a false light.
They got away before
the union to create a replica of he.
I didn't.
He was covered in darkness.
I refused to see
I blinded myself.
Found an old red and black book
buried under dirty clothes.
The key to his strange demeanor.
A symbol used in dark cults on its cover.
It gave me weird feelings.
I couldn't put it down.
I was curious.
Highlighted text
Underlined text
Stars next to text.
This was his bible.
Naked women
photos
books
videos.
His hobby.
Ignorant me.
I was an answer to his dark prayer.
A sex slave.
My duties
to serve him
to give him
to do for him...
in return for my loyalty
a stick
to poke
to stroke
to jab
to hurt.
I sought a way out
of this mess
he called a relationship.
This was a virus.
I was infected with
his lies
his life
his dream
his plan
his scheme.
Let someone else be his prey,
so I prayed.
The sex slave left.
That's when he came to his senses,
but it was too late.
Nicholl McGuire
Behind the face was evil.
The first date
Corners of eyes were looking at someone else.
Next date
Phone rang unanswered.
Third date
Late again, always an excuse.
Fourth date
Lost in eyes and words.
Fifth date
Life stories.
Sixth date
Lustful thoughts.
Seventh date
His eyes were like snakes still looking at others.
Why did I allow this?
I reasoned it was natural.
I shook away what I thought was insecurity.
Told him I didn't believe in men having women friends.
He thought I didn't know any better.
I should have said I didn't believe he could be a friend to women.
He held my hand.
Lips desperate for a kiss.
Another lie dripped from his tongue.
I wasn't his only one,
he guided us to a false light.
They got away before
the union to create a replica of he.
I didn't.
He was covered in darkness.
I refused to see
I blinded myself.
Found an old red and black book
buried under dirty clothes.
The key to his strange demeanor.
A symbol used in dark cults on its cover.
It gave me weird feelings.
I couldn't put it down.
I was curious.
Highlighted text
Underlined text
Stars next to text.
This was his bible.
Naked women
photos
books
videos.
His hobby.
Ignorant me.
I was an answer to his dark prayer.
A sex slave.
My duties
to serve him
to give him
to do for him...
in return for my loyalty
a stick
to poke
to stroke
to jab
to hurt.
I sought a way out
of this mess
he called a relationship.
This was a virus.
I was infected with
his lies
his life
his dream
his plan
his scheme.
Let someone else be his prey,
so I prayed.
The sex slave left.
That's when he came to his senses,
but it was too late.
Nicholl McGuire
The Muse Within Me
She told me my work didn't thrive without love.
Who would be my muse this time?
Would it be the man who paints the beautiful trees?
Or the one with plump lips who speaks so softly.
Maybe it would be the one who loved me when...
or maybe his friend who hid his jealousy.
I loved them all with all their flaws and unique beauties.
One was tall, one white, one brown
one liked to keep his hair down.
One was fat and one just sat
and then there was one who liked to run...
They made my stomach churn, always a lot to learn.
Always fell in love so deeply,
but never did I stay above the clouds for long.
At some point their words would shatter my mind
divide me up into little wretched beings!
I would try each one on like clothing.
Toss those out that didn't fit me.
Oh those temporary lovers--
no spirit!
They tried to take my mind away from me!
Those deceptive liars
with deceptive charms
turned snakes!
I hated them all!
oh they were so ordinary
so dull
so boring
so cheap!
They always took more than what they gave!
Throw them out of my heart, my mind!
Take back what was lost this time!
I needed to find my muse once again within me.
Nicholl McGuire
Who would be my muse this time?
Would it be the man who paints the beautiful trees?
Or the one with plump lips who speaks so softly.
Maybe it would be the one who loved me when...
or maybe his friend who hid his jealousy.
I loved them all with all their flaws and unique beauties.
One was tall, one white, one brown
one liked to keep his hair down.
One was fat and one just sat
and then there was one who liked to run...
They made my stomach churn, always a lot to learn.
Always fell in love so deeply,
but never did I stay above the clouds for long.
At some point their words would shatter my mind
divide me up into little wretched beings!
I would try each one on like clothing.
Toss those out that didn't fit me.
Oh those temporary lovers--
no spirit!
They tried to take my mind away from me!
Those deceptive liars
with deceptive charms
turned snakes!
I hated them all!
oh they were so ordinary
so dull
so boring
so cheap!
They always took more than what they gave!
Throw them out of my heart, my mind!
Take back what was lost this time!
I needed to find my muse once again within me.
Nicholl McGuire
Love is Not Our Foe
What is it that you bare
that makes me stare?
How good you smell
an epitome of male?
Your love I adore
it makes me soar
to far away places
above many faces!
I feel free with you!
That's why I do what I do!
Now what do I see,
"Is that for me?"
A ring that binds,
a meeting of the minds!
Once confused about the "What ifs?"
Deep in thought between guitar riffs.
Use to think about "Could it be?"
It took awhile for us to see.
But now we know
and onward we go...
we realize love is not our foe.
Nicholl McGuire
that makes me stare?
How good you smell
an epitome of male?
Your love I adore
it makes me soar
to far away places
above many faces!
I feel free with you!
That's why I do what I do!
Now what do I see,
"Is that for me?"
A ring that binds,
a meeting of the minds!
Once confused about the "What ifs?"
Deep in thought between guitar riffs.
Use to think about "Could it be?"
It took awhile for us to see.
But now we know
and onward we go...
we realize love is not our foe.
Nicholl McGuire
He Made Me Feel Alive
His young eyes
reminded me of my youth
he told me stories
of his glories.
There was the little league trophies
the awards from the sixth grade
the diploma from high school
and an A in college English.
He was cute.
Real cute.
But you don't bring his type to mom
and you don't even think about dad.
He had no money,
he wasn't a role model dad.
He was a baby
my baby.
The dreams were all in my head.
Another memory
better off I forget.
Nicholl McGuire
reminded me of my youth
he told me stories
of his glories.
There was the little league trophies
the awards from the sixth grade
the diploma from high school
and an A in college English.
He was cute.
Real cute.
But you don't bring his type to mom
and you don't even think about dad.
He had no money,
he wasn't a role model dad.
He was a baby
my baby.
The dreams were all in my head.
Another memory
better off I forget.
Nicholl McGuire
I'm Not Going to Say It, But I Have To...
I wasn't going to say it.
Determined to stick it out.
The words...
oh they sat on the pit of my stomach and were making me ill
too many times I swallowed them!
Those words that kill relationships were bubbling.
Stirring up all kinds of emotions.
Self-control was a challenge.
But one day you made it easy
you reached down inside of me
and made me throw them up!
"Get out!" you said.
"Where do I go?"
It had been a long time since I felt this way.
The last one who said it, put his hands on me.
Why did these men hate me so much?
They never wanted me to say anything to them.
Not a piece of advice, not a compliment, not anything!
They just wanted me to admire them while they stared at my beauty.
Take their instructions and don't ask questions.
Why did I attract fools?
I really didn't want to say it, but he made me...
I didn't want to go, but he helped me walk out the door.
Returned to an old life that didn't treat me much better
only to come back to him again and nothing got better.
He had only become stronger, angrier.
Criticized me for far too long.
Walked by me like I was a pet.
Rolled his eyes like a b*tch.
"I'm tired...tired of you!
Don't breathe on me.
Your breath smells.
Tired of your miserable little hells!
Hate the look of your face.
Tired of this race.
Don't like the way you make me feel.
Your body heavy, you don't skip a meal!
Your devilish eyes
I despise.
Why, oh why, did I believe your lies!"
"So this is it,
we don't fit?" is all you could say.
No more wondering about you
no more worrying about what to do.
So I said it..."we're through!"
and now I am ready to move on.
Nicholl McGuire
Determined to stick it out.
The words...
oh they sat on the pit of my stomach and were making me ill
too many times I swallowed them!
Those words that kill relationships were bubbling.
Stirring up all kinds of emotions.
Self-control was a challenge.
But one day you made it easy
you reached down inside of me
and made me throw them up!
"Get out!" you said.
"Where do I go?"
It had been a long time since I felt this way.
The last one who said it, put his hands on me.
Why did these men hate me so much?
They never wanted me to say anything to them.
Not a piece of advice, not a compliment, not anything!
They just wanted me to admire them while they stared at my beauty.
Take their instructions and don't ask questions.
Why did I attract fools?
I really didn't want to say it, but he made me...
I didn't want to go, but he helped me walk out the door.
Returned to an old life that didn't treat me much better
only to come back to him again and nothing got better.
He had only become stronger, angrier.
Criticized me for far too long.
Walked by me like I was a pet.
Rolled his eyes like a b*tch.
"I'm tired...tired of you!
Don't breathe on me.
Your breath smells.
Tired of your miserable little hells!
Hate the look of your face.
Tired of this race.
Don't like the way you make me feel.
Your body heavy, you don't skip a meal!
Your devilish eyes
I despise.
Why, oh why, did I believe your lies!"
"So this is it,
we don't fit?" is all you could say.
No more wondering about you
no more worrying about what to do.
So I said it..."we're through!"
and now I am ready to move on.
Nicholl McGuire
Second Best
He didn't pick me first.
I was his second best.
The one he had in mind first,
was in love with someone else.
She didn't like him.
He was too old.
She was smart.
There was no chemistry
he was a bore.
Distance separated the two
or maybe it was time...
His mind walked away from number one
and became distracted with number two.
But it wasn't easy getting over number one.
It took awhile for the midlife headache to go away.
He copied the photograph of his crisis
from a MySpace page.
Downloaded some songs
and fantasized about her...and others.
While he reflected on what he couldn't have
I fell in love with him for what he promised me.
A sudden wake up call one day,
"I love you" was on my lips.
I really did love him.
The closer I got to him
the further he got away from me.
He always looked for faults, I was too good to be true.
He found them one after the other.
"You don't let me talk."
"You don't say that to the children."
"You this...You that..."
Now he wants me to change...
not going to happen.
I love me.
He got me.
I wasn't his first pick
wasn't the one he had in mind.
He sealed a deal with me with his sperm,
now he has two walking reminders.
That's what happens when you aren't sure.
That's what happens when you think you know.
That's what happens when you pick second best.
Nicholl McGuire
I was his second best.
The one he had in mind first,
was in love with someone else.
She didn't like him.
He was too old.
She was smart.
There was no chemistry
he was a bore.
Distance separated the two
or maybe it was time...
His mind walked away from number one
and became distracted with number two.
But it wasn't easy getting over number one.
It took awhile for the midlife headache to go away.
He copied the photograph of his crisis
from a MySpace page.
Downloaded some songs
and fantasized about her...and others.
While he reflected on what he couldn't have
I fell in love with him for what he promised me.
A sudden wake up call one day,
"I love you" was on my lips.
I really did love him.
The closer I got to him
the further he got away from me.
He always looked for faults, I was too good to be true.
He found them one after the other.
"You don't let me talk."
"You don't say that to the children."
"You this...You that..."
Now he wants me to change...
not going to happen.
I love me.
He got me.
I wasn't his first pick
wasn't the one he had in mind.
He sealed a deal with me with his sperm,
now he has two walking reminders.
That's what happens when you aren't sure.
That's what happens when you think you know.
That's what happens when you pick second best.
Nicholl McGuire
Turn Around, You Left Your TV On
I had left, then came back
to what he promised me.
The world had been so mean, nasty--
like a bird I needed a nest.
An escape from dramas, murder and mayhem, so I thought...
Just wanted to sit at home in peace with my love.
So I walked into a room
with a dead man seated on the sofa
eyes glued on the TV.
He didn't hear me when I called out,
told the idiot his food was ready.
He was too busy watching the box.
The phone had rung
someone had died
I had cried
wiped the tears from my eyes
started to speak
but he was watching another woman's tears.
The game is on
The news was on
The reality show will be on.
It's never a good time to interrupt.
I started to reach out to hug him
but he was rushing to get a snack
to get back to the couple on the screen making love.
The TV had enslaved his mind, he was dumb
and numb with feet bound for hours!
TV kept the fool indoors like an elderly man
in a hospice while I kept the food and drink coming.
He's still young
but he will be old real soon
then what will he do?
Hours of chaos and death
can't be good for any man's soul.
Minutes of companies
begging for yet another dollar.
Seconds of tunes
to penetrate dreams.
I told him I loved him
he said, "what?"
I told him I hated him
he said, "huh?"
I told him I was leaving him...
he got up.
Turn around, you left your TV on.
Nicholl McGuire
to what he promised me.
The world had been so mean, nasty--
like a bird I needed a nest.
An escape from dramas, murder and mayhem, so I thought...
Just wanted to sit at home in peace with my love.
So I walked into a room
with a dead man seated on the sofa
eyes glued on the TV.
He didn't hear me when I called out,
told the idiot his food was ready.
He was too busy watching the box.
The phone had rung
someone had died
I had cried
wiped the tears from my eyes
started to speak
but he was watching another woman's tears.
The game is on
The news was on
The reality show will be on.
It's never a good time to interrupt.
I started to reach out to hug him
but he was rushing to get a snack
to get back to the couple on the screen making love.
The TV had enslaved his mind, he was dumb
and numb with feet bound for hours!
TV kept the fool indoors like an elderly man
in a hospice while I kept the food and drink coming.
He's still young
but he will be old real soon
then what will he do?
Hours of chaos and death
can't be good for any man's soul.
Minutes of companies
begging for yet another dollar.
Seconds of tunes
to penetrate dreams.
I told him I loved him
he said, "what?"
I told him I hated him
he said, "huh?"
I told him I was leaving him...
he got up.
Turn around, you left your TV on.
Nicholl McGuire
I Thought I Was In Love
I thought I was in love,
I thought I had it all.
But now I realize,
I was Humpty who had a great fall!
I needed a friend who had a few ends,
but all he had really was many great sins!
Told me he was true,
left me feelin' blue.
I don't desire him now like I desired him then,
because my heart is cold and dented like tin.
Too many hits from life --
always fighting strife.
I don't tell my story
for pity or glory.
Just don't want my girls to end up on Maury!
I know what it feels like to be lonely in bed
popping pills for the drama inside your head!
I am not lonely nor am I l blessed
more often than not I feel stressed!
Being pulled from place to place.
Having to look at yet another man's face!
Looking for freedom on a street called, "Where?"
Carrying a heavy, large heart with a tear.
Yeah I thought I was in love
thought I had it all,
but now I realize I was Humpty
who had a great fall!
Nicholl McGuire http://www.twitter.com/poemsbynicholl
I thought I had it all.
But now I realize,
I was Humpty who had a great fall!
I needed a friend who had a few ends,
but all he had really was many great sins!
Told me he was true,
left me feelin' blue.
I don't desire him now like I desired him then,
because my heart is cold and dented like tin.
Too many hits from life --
always fighting strife.
I don't tell my story
for pity or glory.
Just don't want my girls to end up on Maury!
I know what it feels like to be lonely in bed
popping pills for the drama inside your head!
I am not lonely nor am I l blessed
more often than not I feel stressed!
Being pulled from place to place.
Having to look at yet another man's face!
Looking for freedom on a street called, "Where?"
Carrying a heavy, large heart with a tear.
Yeah I thought I was in love
thought I had it all,
but now I realize I was Humpty
who had a great fall!
Nicholl McGuire http://www.twitter.com/poemsbynicholl
Head Games
Sometimes a love poem about heartache is just what you need to remind you not to fall for the foolishness of the past again. See here:
Head Games
Head Games
Love Came Knocking on My Door
Love oh love
came knocking on the door
brought some healing
for my heart that was sore.
Where have you been
while I lied in sin?
At church praying for me?
A child once blind, but now I see!
I don't deserve you
been very bad.
Walking around often feeling sad.
Made the angels hang their heads low
was a villain in a show.
Thought God would tell me "no."
No to a lovely marriage
no to a baby in a carriage.
No to all the dreams
between my midnight screams.
But his love, his grace
brought me through
don't know where I would be without you!
came knocking on the door
brought some healing
for my heart that was sore.
Where have you been
while I lied in sin?
At church praying for me?
A child once blind, but now I see!
I don't deserve you
been very bad.
Walking around often feeling sad.
Made the angels hang their heads low
was a villain in a show.
Thought God would tell me "no."
No to a lovely marriage
no to a baby in a carriage.
No to all the dreams
between my midnight screams.
But his love, his grace
brought me through
don't know where I would be without you!
Interracial Pain
Black, white, red, yellow, brown
they saw colors
we didn't.
Told us we would outgrow one another, that was a lie.
They saw two people from two different worlds.
We saw one world with one view - love.
Who were they to try to disturb calm seas?
Who were they who claimed to look out for our best interest?
They were fearful of the message, the bigger picture.
They feared change, we didn't.
Love has no limits, no boundaries.
It isn't self-serving, cowardly, emotional, hostile, white or black.
I loved him, he loved me.
Notice past tense.
For wide open eyes that just stared as we walked, talked won in the long run.
Quiet whispers, eye rolls, hate planted seeds in young minds in the short-run.
How long, how long did we have to fight them about us?
Crying behind closed doors, tears wetting sheets.
Heavy hearts we had back then. The pain just too deep.
Pressure seemed to weigh on our hearts, our minds.
It wasn't enough anymore to say, "Love conquers all."
We had grown weary, tired of the spotlight.
Decades strolled by while we cleansed our minds, hearts of memory.
We see black and white everyday holding hands.
He on one side of the world and I on the other.
While holding a woman that looks like him and I holding a man that looks like me, we think, "That couple could have been us. That couple should have been us!"
But we were no longer color blind.
they saw colors
we didn't.
Told us we would outgrow one another, that was a lie.
They saw two people from two different worlds.
We saw one world with one view - love.
Who were they to try to disturb calm seas?
Who were they who claimed to look out for our best interest?
They were fearful of the message, the bigger picture.
They feared change, we didn't.
Love has no limits, no boundaries.
It isn't self-serving, cowardly, emotional, hostile, white or black.
I loved him, he loved me.
Notice past tense.
For wide open eyes that just stared as we walked, talked won in the long run.
Quiet whispers, eye rolls, hate planted seeds in young minds in the short-run.
How long, how long did we have to fight them about us?
Crying behind closed doors, tears wetting sheets.
Heavy hearts we had back then. The pain just too deep.
Pressure seemed to weigh on our hearts, our minds.
It wasn't enough anymore to say, "Love conquers all."
We had grown weary, tired of the spotlight.
Decades strolled by while we cleansed our minds, hearts of memory.
We see black and white everyday holding hands.
He on one side of the world and I on the other.
While holding a woman that looks like him and I holding a man that looks like me, we think, "That couple could have been us. That couple should have been us!"
But we were no longer color blind.
Poem: Someone like Me
There are those times when we wonder if there is anyone who understands us. In my quest to learn to look inwardly and appreciate me, I thought about "Someone Like Me" as the poem illustrates.
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There are those times when we wonder if there is anyone who understands us. In my quest to learn to look inwardly and appreciate me, I thought about "Someone Like Me" as the poem illustrates.
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No Good Jesse
Not happy with my life!
Angered with the man I once cared about.
Taken for a ride,
but not anymore.
He doesn’t want his family,
ruining his profile.
He does what is convenient for self --
the littlest of things.
Major sacrifices?
Not on this man's agenda.
He has issues!
Still caught up in the past,
with thoughts and feet walking.
How can one move on with his life?
When he still ponders about the “what ifs" of life?
If you knew him you would love him --
temporarily that is...
Until you learned of his selfishness,
his insecurities,
his lies!
Did I tell you he was a liar?
Holds his head in an odd way.
Looks down,
looks around...
As if I can’t see the truth.
Always hiding something.
Says he isn’t doing this or that.
But he is always doing.
Whether driving to places,
if I only knew.
Whether texting messages,
if only I knew.
Whether flirting with the ladies on the street,
if only I knew.
But I know.
I can’t go,
not yet.
No plan!
Too easy to run
to nothing ahead,
only to turn back around again.
So I’ll just wait.
Nicholl McGuire
Sex, Sex and More Sex
Thoughts not to be interrupted
an imagined world
where actions make up the inner being of a nymphomaniac
desires, passions to make love
over and over again and again
no specific gender or race
no specific size or weight
no desired place
no desired position
the heat arises
between the thighs
as one creates graphic
scenes of being toyed
handcuffs
body oil
bubble baths
are used in this game
committed relationships
are not on the mind
to be fingered like a bowling ball
to be groped like cow's teats
to be saddled like a horse
these are the things on the mind
haunting, yet suttle thoughts of disease
begin to disappear as the sexual anticipation begins to set in
foreplay moments are forgotten
as quick as they begin
hot, breathy sighs
high-pitched screams mixed with pain, pleasure
between quiet, endless moans
a good time is almost over
and reality will begin to unfold
in coming days.
Nicholl McGuire
Forgetting Isn't Easy
You won't forget me
when your alone
lying on your bed at night.
You won't forget me
when she's riding you
and making circles on your chest
with her fingertips.
You won't forget me because certain songs,
dances, restaurants, and parks will be long-lasting
reminders.
I will float through your mind
and you will only hate me more,
because you won't be able to fight
the feeling I leave after
I float away.
At first glance my image
was permanently reflected
in your vision.
When we first talked my voice
found home in your ears.
When we first touched, my hands
left hidden scars on your skin.
and when we first made love...
(something you may now regret)
the chills, the thrills, the taste,
the passion became a part of you.
Way down deep within your heart,
you will continue to burn for me,
to scream for me, to ache for me,
to hate me!
Even long after...you will love someone
like you loved me, you will kiss someone
the way you did me and you will embrace
someone like you did me
and this will all happen because
we became one for just one night.
Nicholl McGuire
http://lovedatingadvice.blogspot.com
Separate
It's easy to say
I don't love you
I don't need you
I don't want you
It's over.
We're no good for each other
we're too young for this
we're confused over the phone.
But what is it about standing in front
of one another
looking into eyes
and not being able to think or speak
what we really, truly feel
underneath our hearts
in the pit of our stomachs.
The words are drowning reaching out to hold, to kiss
only the bandages
to cover the wounds
and you never say it
until it's too late...
Tears, screams
and physical fights
the words come from your mouth like vomit
and you can't take them back!
Mixed with hate, frustration
your vomit just lies there waiting
for you to clean it up!
But it's too late...
You should have said what
you felt, a long time ago
should have exposed your wounds,
but now,
it's too late.
So you sit back on a couch
alone
rehearsing a new scenario.
Nicholl McGuire
http://www.twitter.com/poemsbynicholl
I don't love you
I don't need you
I don't want you
It's over.
We're no good for each other
we're too young for this
we're confused over the phone.
But what is it about standing in front
of one another
looking into eyes
and not being able to think or speak
what we really, truly feel
underneath our hearts
in the pit of our stomachs.
The words are drowning reaching out to hold, to kiss
only the bandages
to cover the wounds
and you never say it
until it's too late...
Tears, screams
and physical fights
the words come from your mouth like vomit
and you can't take them back!
Mixed with hate, frustration
your vomit just lies there waiting
for you to clean it up!
But it's too late...
You should have said what
you felt, a long time ago
should have exposed your wounds,
but now,
it's too late.
So you sit back on a couch
alone
rehearsing a new scenario.
Nicholl McGuire
http://www.twitter.com/poemsbynicholl
Is Love Really a Pit?
I'm falling down in that pit they call love.
Everyone smiling in the pit, everyone frowning up above.
And just before I reach bottom,
I grab hold to a small rope
dangling from above
and then I begin to climb away.
Yet, the pit promises a good life.
Suffocation is my worry.
Loneliness creates confusion.
Past pain nags at my soul.
I try to climb away toward
those strangers at the top.
Their smiling, urging me on.
Then my conscience whispers
and I let go of the rope.
The strangers, up above, frown.
I fall further down into the pit
wearing a false smile
along the way
I fall.
Nicholl McGuire
http://associatedcontent.com/nichollmcguire
Everyone smiling in the pit, everyone frowning up above.
And just before I reach bottom,
I grab hold to a small rope
dangling from above
and then I begin to climb away.
Yet, the pit promises a good life.
Suffocation is my worry.
Loneliness creates confusion.
Past pain nags at my soul.
I try to climb away toward
those strangers at the top.
Their smiling, urging me on.
Then my conscience whispers
and I let go of the rope.
The strangers, up above, frown.
I fall further down into the pit
wearing a false smile
along the way
I fall.
Nicholl McGuire
http://associatedcontent.com/nichollmcguire
Melody
It is unclear in my mind - the melody
a sweet, sad love song
for once I am alone in my feelings
no one around to share the constant struggles
of not knowing
when it's safe
to trust
to love
to care
it hurts, but it doesn't hurt
to imitate love
to create an intense passion
knowing that I couldn't care less
can't depend on anyone
to fulfill voids in my wounded heart
can't cling to anyone
to satisfy my selfish desires
yet for a price
I can be temporarily put at ease
when all my world around me
seems to be weighing on my back
I can be relieved
while lying on back
poor soul of mine
I am lost
and the love song keeps playing
and I keep trying to remember
the painful melody
one day soon I will save
my heart some grief
but for now I keep forgetting
and I continue to walk on
needles and egg shells trying
to make sense of nonsense
soon I will throw my hands up
high above my head
and I will be carried to some
higher place for a visit
and I will remember
the melody as it will play
one last time
and it will be then
that this poor soul will know.
a sweet, sad love song
for once I am alone in my feelings
no one around to share the constant struggles
of not knowing
when it's safe
to trust
to love
to care
it hurts, but it doesn't hurt
to imitate love
to create an intense passion
knowing that I couldn't care less
can't depend on anyone
to fulfill voids in my wounded heart
can't cling to anyone
to satisfy my selfish desires
yet for a price
I can be temporarily put at ease
when all my world around me
seems to be weighing on my back
I can be relieved
while lying on back
poor soul of mine
I am lost
and the love song keeps playing
and I keep trying to remember
the painful melody
one day soon I will save
my heart some grief
but for now I keep forgetting
and I continue to walk on
needles and egg shells trying
to make sense of nonsense
soon I will throw my hands up
high above my head
and I will be carried to some
higher place for a visit
and I will remember
the melody as it will play
one last time
and it will be then
that this poor soul will know.
Worldly True Love
True Love cannot be specifically explained.
True Love is blind to one's faults, differences
acknowledges beliefs
loving, trusting, caring...
Until
True Love disagrees, money runs out, and distraction entertains.
True Love then becomes secretive,
yet open about every negative done wrong to it.
True Love is kind and understanding based on conditions met.
True Love isn't tempted as long as rules are followed.
It isn't second-guessed unless security is compromised.
True Love radiates, smiles when it is bought.
Nicholl McGuire
http://associatedcontent.com/nichollmcguire
True Love is blind to one's faults, differences
acknowledges beliefs
loving, trusting, caring...
Until
True Love disagrees, money runs out, and distraction entertains.
True Love then becomes secretive,
yet open about every negative done wrong to it.
True Love is kind and understanding based on conditions met.
True Love isn't tempted as long as rules are followed.
It isn't second-guessed unless security is compromised.
True Love radiates, smiles when it is bought.
Nicholl McGuire
http://associatedcontent.com/nichollmcguire
Business As Usual
my lovemaking
soulful, rhythmic
smooth like my brown thighs.
when I walk, I sway
from left to right
I pulsate
you gyrate
I bend
you sigh,
"Good God Almighty!"
my lovemaking
generous, passionate
and sensual
like my flavors.
when I talk, I move
my lips up and down
my tongue exposed
you swallow
I tease.
my lovemaking
creative, beautiful
unique.
when I smile, you smile
take me all in
and I know what your thinking
behind that old grin.
and our business is complete
and its time to say goodbye
as I walk away
you have one hand
on your thigh.
Nicholl McGuire
http://www.twitter.com/poemsbynicholl
soulful, rhythmic
smooth like my brown thighs.
when I walk, I sway
from left to right
I pulsate
you gyrate
I bend
you sigh,
"Good God Almighty!"
my lovemaking
generous, passionate
and sensual
like my flavors.
when I talk, I move
my lips up and down
my tongue exposed
you swallow
I tease.
my lovemaking
creative, beautiful
unique.
when I smile, you smile
take me all in
and I know what your thinking
behind that old grin.
and our business is complete
and its time to say goodbye
as I walk away
you have one hand
on your thigh.
Nicholl McGuire
http://www.twitter.com/poemsbynicholl
When God is Your Soul Mate
Come follow me.
A warm smile, inviting.
A soft voice, charming.
A loving embrace, soothing.
Come follow me.
I'll make you laugh.
I'll make you cry.
I'll make you shout.
I'll make you dance.
All for the sake of living.
For you are my soul mate and I am yours.
Nicholl McGuire
http://spiritualpoemsbynicholl.blogspot.com
A warm smile, inviting.
A soft voice, charming.
A loving embrace, soothing.
Come follow me.
I'll make you laugh.
I'll make you cry.
I'll make you shout.
I'll make you dance.
All for the sake of living.
For you are my soul mate and I am yours.
Nicholl McGuire
http://spiritualpoemsbynicholl.blogspot.com
Met a Man Named "Love"
He walked with a strut
had a nice round butt.
Talked real low
his rap did flow.
I ran after him
waited for the lights to grow dim.
Had no cover
Had no brother.
He could have done what he wanted
since I taunted.
But he was kind
a hard to find.
He said his name was Love
claimed he was from above.
But I couldn't see
too busy pushing me.
He met me at the well.
Told me he liked to sail.
Asked me if I knew
if the words he spoke were true.
He talked about being
someone I remember seeing.
But my flesh was in the way
didn't like what he had to say.
So away he went.
Later I realized who was sent.
Nicholl McGuire
http://spiritualpoemsbynicholl.blogspot.com
had a nice round butt.
Talked real low
his rap did flow.
I ran after him
waited for the lights to grow dim.
Had no cover
Had no brother.
He could have done what he wanted
since I taunted.
But he was kind
a hard to find.
He said his name was Love
claimed he was from above.
But I couldn't see
too busy pushing me.
He met me at the well.
Told me he liked to sail.
Asked me if I knew
if the words he spoke were true.
He talked about being
someone I remember seeing.
But my flesh was in the way
didn't like what he had to say.
So away he went.
Later I realized who was sent.
Nicholl McGuire
http://spiritualpoemsbynicholl.blogspot.com
Show Me Some Love
You say you want to keep me around
want to lift me off the ground.
But what are you doing to win my heart?
Positive words you said at the start.
But things get old
so I am told
especially if you don't glisten gold.
What were you really trying to gain?
Just another man driving me insane?
Until now I thought I really knew you
but the truth of the matter is "What do you do?"
You told me you had money
your words dripped like honey.
I didn't really care
since I had my own to spare.
Is this the game men play
when they want a lay?
Is this what they say
while we think wedding day?
There is more to love
than money and sex.
Show me some love
don't perplex.
Nicholl McGuire
http://spiritualpoemsbynicholl.blogspot.com
want to lift me off the ground.
But what are you doing to win my heart?
Positive words you said at the start.
But things get old
so I am told
especially if you don't glisten gold.
What were you really trying to gain?
Just another man driving me insane?
Until now I thought I really knew you
but the truth of the matter is "What do you do?"
You told me you had money
your words dripped like honey.
I didn't really care
since I had my own to spare.
Is this the game men play
when they want a lay?
Is this what they say
while we think wedding day?
There is more to love
than money and sex.
Show me some love
don't perplex.
Nicholl McGuire
http://spiritualpoemsbynicholl.blogspot.com
For the Love of Hip Hop
You spoke words in my ear over top of the beat of a drum
every morning
you made me feel good
ready to start my day
I heard you moan in your songs
reach high notes
and embrace my spirit with your low notes.
Your lyrics freed me from the pain, fear, and anxiety I felt
for I was going to a school that broke rules.
Students didn't care whether they lived or died.
You were my highschool sweetheart
your name Hip Hop.
You decorated me with your bright colors
big hoop earrings
sculptured hair
you told me that the white man was my enemy.
But I loved him anyway, he was my Hip Hop.
He bought for me, stroked me,
told me he cared about me.
Called me beautiful, paid attention to me.
He supplied me with the hip in your hop
to keep me coming back for more.
I rocked to your beat.
I felt your melody.
I envisioned a future with you.
I was going to be your b-girl and you would be my b-boy.
But I found out your words lie, curse, and made me do things I really didn't want to.
Made me feel like I was on top of the world, when I really wasn't.
Promised me a better life with every hip into bed and every hop elsewhere.
Hip Hop was a pimp recruiting hoes and I was no better, didn't get paid for the lyrics I wrote and the gyrating I did.
Visions of sex, lust, strong drink, money, and angry words flooded my mind.
I got my daily fill of hip hop's promises for every music video I watched, for every song I bobbed my head to, for every fan I listened to.
You didn't love me.
You loved what I could do for you.
And in the end you were no different than the devil himself.
Nicholl McGuire
http://associatedcontent.com/nichollmcguire
every morning
you made me feel good
ready to start my day
I heard you moan in your songs
reach high notes
and embrace my spirit with your low notes.
Your lyrics freed me from the pain, fear, and anxiety I felt
for I was going to a school that broke rules.
Students didn't care whether they lived or died.
You were my highschool sweetheart
your name Hip Hop.
You decorated me with your bright colors
big hoop earrings
sculptured hair
you told me that the white man was my enemy.
But I loved him anyway, he was my Hip Hop.
He bought for me, stroked me,
told me he cared about me.
Called me beautiful, paid attention to me.
He supplied me with the hip in your hop
to keep me coming back for more.
I rocked to your beat.
I felt your melody.
I envisioned a future with you.
I was going to be your b-girl and you would be my b-boy.
But I found out your words lie, curse, and made me do things I really didn't want to.
Made me feel like I was on top of the world, when I really wasn't.
Promised me a better life with every hip into bed and every hop elsewhere.
Hip Hop was a pimp recruiting hoes and I was no better, didn't get paid for the lyrics I wrote and the gyrating I did.
Visions of sex, lust, strong drink, money, and angry words flooded my mind.
I got my daily fill of hip hop's promises for every music video I watched, for every song I bobbed my head to, for every fan I listened to.
You didn't love me.
You loved what I could do for you.
And in the end you were no different than the devil himself.
Nicholl McGuire
http://associatedcontent.com/nichollmcguire
Lying Lovers
"An honest answer is like a kiss on the lips," according to a passage of scripture in the book of Proverbs. As much as I would like to write a love poem today, I am not. I rather speak on this issue of honesty. What exactly is honesty? Well nowadays people have their own version of honesty, the one they tell and the one they don't. I have learned over the years that a lover's eyes speak more than anything he or she could ever say or do.
Lovers lie when things get old in relationships. They lie about falling out of love, they lie about what happened during their days when they have been apart from their mate (even when they don't say anything), they lie about the way one another looks, the way they feel, and even when they say thank you, they lie. How can one become one with a liar?
I have learned that as much as we suppress very real emotions about how we feel about our lovers, the truth is we have to allow those feelings to manifest themselves. Once we realize the truth then we proceed to the next step in our relationships whatever that might be.
Men and women play games with hearts and minds whether on purpose or by accident and when this happens something or someone dies. So with that said, I have decades of experience with love, heartbreak, unfaithfulness, and more as you will see in my writings. Enjoy and feel free to share my poetry with your lover.
Nicholl McGuire
http://nichollmcguire.blogspot.com/
Lovers lie when things get old in relationships. They lie about falling out of love, they lie about what happened during their days when they have been apart from their mate (even when they don't say anything), they lie about the way one another looks, the way they feel, and even when they say thank you, they lie. How can one become one with a liar?
I have learned that as much as we suppress very real emotions about how we feel about our lovers, the truth is we have to allow those feelings to manifest themselves. Once we realize the truth then we proceed to the next step in our relationships whatever that might be.
Men and women play games with hearts and minds whether on purpose or by accident and when this happens something or someone dies. So with that said, I have decades of experience with love, heartbreak, unfaithfulness, and more as you will see in my writings. Enjoy and feel free to share my poetry with your lover.
Nicholl McGuire
http://nichollmcguire.blogspot.com/
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