Second Best

He didn't pick me first.
I was his second best.

The one he had in mind first,
was in love with someone else.

She didn't like him.
He was too old.
She was smart.
There was no chemistry
he was a bore.

Distance separated the two
or maybe it was time...

His mind walked away from number one
and became distracted with number two.

But it wasn't easy getting over number one.
It took awhile for the midlife headache to go away.
He copied the photograph of his crisis
from a MySpace page.
Downloaded some songs
and fantasized about her...and others.

While he reflected on what he couldn't have
I fell in love with him for what he promised me.
A sudden wake up call one day,
"I love you" was on my lips.
I really did love him.

The closer I got to him
the further he got away from me.
He always looked for faults, I was too good to be true.
He found them one after the other.
"You don't let me talk."
"You don't say that to the children."
"You this...You that..."

Now he wants me to change...
not going to happen.

I love me.
He got me.
I wasn't his first pick
wasn't the one he had in mind.

He sealed a deal with me with his sperm,
now he has two walking reminders.

That's what happens when you aren't sure.
That's what happens when you think you know.
That's what happens when you pick second best.

Nicholl McGuire